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Oh Microsoft… you make it too easy sometimes

Here is a link to a funny KB article:

XL97: Data Not Returned from Query Using ORACLE Data Source – http://support.microsoft.com/kb/168702 

WORKAROUND:

Method 2: Move Your Mouse Pointer
If you move your mouse pointer continuously while the data is being returned to Microsoft Excel, the query may not fail. Do not stop moving the mouse until all the data has been returned to Microsoft Excel.

NOTE: Depending on your query, it may take several minutes to return the results of your query to the worksheet.  

Some funny comments:

@AdamMachanic – @BrentO I really like the note re: the query may take several minutes. Imagining a biz user, in a suit, moving the mouse for a half hour…
@BrentO – @AdamMachanic Or even better, the biz user gets their assistant to do it, and they put it on resume: “Oracle Input Device Administrator.”
@peschkaj – @BrentO You’re thinking low-tech. You put the mouse on one of those vibrating baby chair things.
@BrentO – @peschkaj ah, now that’s an enterprise solution right there.

Anyone else have any good ones they’d like to share??

 

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3 Comments

  1. http://support.microsoft.com/?kbid=890546

    Symptom – The remote stops working when changing channels
    Cause – You frequently change TV channels with remote

    *sigh* LOL

  2. Automating the ridiculous:

    using System;
    using System.Runtime.InteropServices;

    namespace KeepinOracleAlive{

    class SomeClass {
    public const int WM_MOUSEMOVE = 0x0200;

    [DllImport(“user32.dll”,CharSet=CharSet.Auto)]
    private static extern int SendMessage(IntPtr hWnd, int wMsg, IntPtr wParam, IntPtr lParam);

    [DllImport(“user32.dll”)]
    static extern IntPtr FindWindow(string lpClassName, string lpWindowName);

    private static void ShakeThatMouse() {

    IntPtr hwnd = FindWindow(“That app”, “That window”);
    IntPtr wparam = new IntPtr(0x1);
    IntPtr lparam = new IntPtr(0xFFE0008A);
    SendMessage(hwnd, WM_MOUSEMOVE, wparam, lparam);
    }

    private static void Main( string[] args ) {
    while (true)
    {
    ShakeThatMouse();
    }
    }
    }
    }

  3. LOL awesome hahahaha

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